The Winter Blues

Yes, it has hit with full force, the normal yet awful Swedish winter blues. The grey days have officially gotten to me. Please pray. Today was an especially rough day for me.

We talked with our adoption agency and they are unsure as to whether or not we make enough money to adopt from Nepal. Now logically I can look at our last adoption and know that we made less money then and still were able to adopt, but emotionally I am struggling. Hearing that we may not make enough brings on emotions of guilt that I stay home while my husband works three jobs. Andreas and I both agreed that staying home would be the best for Samuel (and I can't lie that it is nice not to have to work at times). But when you hear things like you don't make enough to adopt it gets you thinking.

I have been reminding myself all day that God is in control and I have a beautiful little boy to prove it, this is when having the Swedish winter blues doesn't help (not that it ever does). However, tonight God sent me an "earnest" (ask Prof. Lauter what that is), it snowed. So late tonight, Kelty, my trusty golden retreiver, and I took a long walk. I love it when it snows and all is quiet (except for the occasional yahoo that has to drive like a manic down the road). It helps me think and remember the sermon that my husband preached last Sunday. "Fix your eyes on Jesus" , "Throw of the sin that so easily entangles", "I will make you as white as snow". The last one wasn't in the sermon, but come on it is a given when you are walking through the snow. So tonight as I struggle not to have the blues and to trust without worry these are the verses that I cling to. Hope in some way they help you too.

Please pray with me! It helps to know that I still have friends out there beyond the internet.

blessings,
Laurie