Wednesday, March 13, 2013

That Yucky Feeling

I adore my boys.  They make me laugh, cry, and all the emotions in between.  Then, there are the times that they absolutely drive me mad.  I think we all know what I am talking about.  


Now in my 7 1/2 years of motherhood, I have had to face just how selfish I am, how to deal with things that I fear, how to deal with LOTS of noise (my boys are really loud), how to answer questions that I simple don't know the answers too, how to come up with appropriate and creative consequences (whether good or bad), and how to deal with my boys growing up faster than I can say boo!

Through all of this there is one thing that will get me annoyed in an instant (yet it is a perfectly normal part of siblings and I am thrilled that the boys are actually bonded and at this point), it is when the boys start picking at each other on purpose and fighting.  Before we left for Nepal they were doing really well.  We had been working on attitude and accepting the other person (with all their personality) and learning to love them through it (not an easy lesson for an adult...).  Our goal is always to build each other up and not tear each other apart.  Even while we were gone Andreas' parent said they did wonderfully.  Sure there were times that they bickered a little, but overall they were really good to each other.

Then enters mom and dad again!

David, (who is our over-sensitive one), became extra over-sensitive. And Samuel, (our independent, wants to always be in charge one), became extra annoyed when things didn't go exactly how he wanted.  I was not surprised by this.  We had never left the boys for that long before (it was really hard on me and I missed them greatly). However, when all those emotions are flying around they tend to crash into one another and create a yucky feeling in the house.  There was constant bickering between the two boys.  They were fighting for silly or no reason at all.

About a week ago I drew the LINE!  NO MORE!

I really can't stand it when your home becomes one of negativity and fights.  It is no longer a place of calm family fun...(well not so calm with my boys...but fun).  So I prayed, HELP!  I sat down with the boys and talked about what was happening and what needed to happen and that there would be NO tolerance for tearing each other down.  We talked about how people tore each other down in the Bible and how Jesus wants us to act and react to one another.

And I have PRAYED! And we PRAYED!

Now I can't say that we are at 100% perfect performance, but I can say that things are getting better.  The home feels a little more calm (the emotions have also calmed to an extent).  But I also see Sam bringing home attitudes and tones from school that I don't like and David picks them up way too quickly.

Is anyone out there in the same position?
Does anyone have ideas on the way they deal with it?

Just wondering as we try to navigate these beautiful boys through life.

Blessings,
Laurie

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