I'm Back

I am back.  My husband fixed everything last night (thank you Cydil) and we are back and running, which is good because I have a lot of backlog to get up.  

First things first....My little David is now fully and completely potty trained!  Yeah, I am so excited it has taken a year and a half since the adoption.  

Let's face it potty training can be hard in any circumstance, but when you are adopting a toddler who is in the middle of potty training when he is adopted...it can become more of an issue.  David was not wearing diapers during the weeks before his adoption.  However, being taken from his children's home in Be*jing (where his surgeries took place and he lived for almost two years) and placed back into the children's home in Urumq* (where he was found) for two weeks then handed to complete strangers set back his progress which he would not regain for another year. 

It becomes not only the issue of learning to control his bladder, but learning to feel safe and secure in his new environment.  Which is also attached to communication, which is attached to bonding, which is attached too.....well, you get the picture.  Potty training became last on the long list of what was good and healthy for this little one.  

After about 8 months home I started asking David if he wanted to take off his diaper.  His answer...''NO''.  So we let it rest, but mentioned it every once in a while.  As his communication began to increase he started to tell us when he needed to pea, but continued to do so in his diaper during the day.  He seemed to be scared of the toilet, yet a bit interested.  In a few weeks we started to get to the bathroom.  We finally took off daytime diapers 9 months (or so) in.  He had many accidents and at times it was really hard not to get frustrated.  It was hard to figure out if he really couldn't control his bladder, if he really wasn't feeling comfortable with his surroundings or if he was just being plain lazy.  I am sure that I judged wrong some of the time.  We always had to put the diapers back on for number 2...he really wasn't comfortable with the toilet for that.

In August of this year as we moved to Norway, we decided to try to just use the diapers for nighttime.  I know, I know it didn't sound smart for a move to try to ween him off of daytime diapers for everything.  However, I was getting the distinct feeling that he was simply being lazy.  He kept asking to take them off at night, but they were totally full every morning and I was not willing to take that on yet when we hadn't been able to stay out of them throughout the day.  I have to say that David really did a great job.  We had to get on him once or twice about pooping in his pants, but he was a trooper and learned really quickly.  Yes, I did bribe him with candy...don't judge me, it worked!

When that was done in October it was time to try to get rid of the night diapers.  We talked to David about it.  Talked about being a big boy...which he wanted because he has a big brother that he wants to mimic.  We started in the beginning of November and have only had one accident since then (and that was only because we read him wrong and didn't take him to the toilet when we needed too).  The only trick for us is that we take him to the toilet before we go to bed and he makes it all the way until morning.  If for some reason he needs to pee...he cries, doesn't really wake up, just cries.  So now we know to get him to the bathroom right away.  I again bribed him...and again it worked, but we are past the bribe now and he just does it.

I do think that because it was so quick and easy with the last two steps that he really was just being lazy, but that is hard to determine.  David still has a hard time expressing himself with words so the emotional state can be a guessing game at times.  During the whole process there was the guess of ''is he ready or is he not'', I am just thankful to be on the other side of the issue and so proud of my little boy....oh, excuse me, my big boy for his progress and his effort.

Laurie