Backlog....Brussels, Belgium!!

I had the wonderful opportunity to go to Belgium with a friend to see another friend that moved there. Again, we love Ryan Air!   It was so great to spend time with Sarah and Dana (both amazing ladies that I have had the priviledge of being in Bible study with.  We ate some great food, laughed like teenagers when Dana's translator told us that I was about to order a turd or dung (yes, it really said that), and explored for a day.  It was a quick visit, but I am so glad that we went.  Oh, I can't forget that we ate an obscene amount of chocolate (what else are you suppose to do in Belgium?)  Thank you Dana for having us, I hope to visit her again with the family (all 4 of us, Dana has been a wonderful prayer warrior and supporter of our adoption).

Enjoy the pics. (unfortunately the pics mixed up, and it is too late for me to deal with it, so the day is a bit mixed up, but still fun)
Laurie

Sarah and Dana in front of the Waterloo
Memorial, which had closed as we walked
up to it, figures.

The beginning of our day in Brussels

This was at the end of the day, the inside
of St. Michaels Church.  There was a service
that began while we were there.  I have videos
I will try to put on tomorrow of the bells and the
organ playing.  

In front of St. Michaels

This was one of the amazing buildings in the main square of Brussels.  This square is where they do the flower carpet every other year  (I hope to see that one in 2012). The bakers use to sell bread at this building, but it is now a museum.  I loved the architecture.

This door made me laugh, as if it came out of some Monty Python film.  The big  gate for giants,  regular door for normal size people and the small door for little people.  This door belonged to the amazing building that was the home of all the gilds in Brussels.

It is really hard to see the amazing architecture, but this square was truly amazing.

These were just two of the chocolate stores we hit (Godiva to the left and Nuehaus to the right).  Dana's last name is Nue, so I guess she is always ment to have this chocolate.  

Us eating....again, yummy.  

This is the Church of Our Lady, beautiful.

The Church of Our Lady

Justice building, covered in scaffolding (or course)

The Atomium in the background

The Sacre Coer in the background

Anything But Routine.....

Hello All,

Well, in a way these days have been very routine, and in so many ways not.  Of course we are going through the emotions or maybe repressing the emotions of anticipation for the ever desired LOA from China. We are looking and relooking at our future as the Methodist church merges with two other denominations here in Sweden (that is a huge can of worms in itself) and in the meantime trying to keep up with Samuel as he learns way to many bad things to say from the older kids in his school (although I am pretty sure that some of the kids his age have potty mouths too).

I have been very delibrately spending time with Jesus each day.  This has helped my outlook tremendously, but I need to remember there are no quick fixes, but disciplining myself and seeking Abba everyday.  Andreas has hit a period of his emotions catching up with him and dental work (which is never a good thing), but we are holding together, not by our own strength, but by the grace of God truly.  The winds of change are blowing, it is so easy to see it, but so hard to know quite yet where they are blowing too.  So we seek.... I am not against or afraid of this change, but sense the need for it.  For those of you wondering, NO we are not thinking of moving back to the States (did you hear that my wonderful mother-in-law?)  The movement for change is just beginning and we have nothing concrete in our thoughts but prayer is needed.  First and formost we must get David home and steady with us, then......?

Just an update on the prayer for John.  He is home PRAISE JESUS!  He is recovering but has a little ways to go as he deals with the drama that happened.  But we are incredibly thankful for his life.  Thank you for your prayers.

And for Ia, jag hoppas att dina barn barn ska komma hem snart! Jag are jätte spännande för dig och för dina barn.  (thought you would appreciate the Swedish) :).

Blessings,
Laurie

What Brings Us To His Feet?

Today is just another day, with all the rituals and non-glamerous things a mom does.  But inside my mind and heart things are moving.  So what is seen on the outside is no where near the volcanoe that is churning on the inside.  There are many cues that have brought me to the place where I am.  Sadly, one of those cues is the fact that my devotional life has been slipping for sometime now.  '' All of the sudden'', I realize that I have been trying to forge so many things on my own again.  ''All of the sudden'', that tidal wave that leaning on Jesus always helps me ride is now overtaking me.

Another cue that has made this impact on me is the referral of our newest son.  Adding to my family makes me take a metal checklist of what is good and not so good, especially about me as mommy.  Our son will come with needs, wants, desires, fears that Andreas and I will have to work through with him and sometimes for him.  He will come with an instant language barrier into a biligual family.  He will come with the desperate need (whether he knows it or not) to know Abba.  So how can I show him, love him properly, and overcome for him, if I haven't spent true time with Abba and have wandered off like a head-strong teenager yet again.  The truth is I can't.

My third cue is the tug-of-war I see in my 6 year olds life.  The tug-of-war between the world and Jesus.  What mom and dad are teaching me and what I hear and see at school.  Sometimes I just want to scream with anger as I see the innocence of my child disappear into the reality of what is.  To be very honest I feel like, at this point, I am losing that battle.  As I scramble to figure out how to help Samuel overcome this with Christ, I realize my folly yet again.  When was the last time I fell at His feet and let my heart burn with Christ's desire and not my own.

So as my mental checklist goes on I realize, yet again, I can do nothing without Him.  I have more special needs than my son!  So I find myself bursting at the seams to yet again, ''seek ye first....''.  Everyday brings forth new and wonderful news about our son's homecoming and my heart says, ''seek ye first...''.  Every afternoon when I pick up Sam from school and he tells me all the not-so-good things he has said in the day (he is wonderfully honest), my heart says, ''seek ye first...''.  Every evening when I just simply want to shut down from all the things that pile up in the day, my heart says, ''seek ye first...''.  So I guess what I am really reminding myself here is that it is not really MY heart saying anything, but Abba say, ''come child.''

Laurie

"Guarded Optimism"

The quote above was posted by John's mom earlier today.  This gives hope, but please continue to pray for John.  He has quite the road ahead of him and still needs lots of time and care to continue on the road to healing. There is a prayer vigil going on now until tomorrow at 12 pm., sponsored by Daybreak Community Church (their church) for John.  It is an open invitation and anyone can join.  You can find it on facebook under Prayer vigil for John Karenbauer. Just go in and sign in on times to pray.  Thank you for caring for this precious family.

For those of you who have been asking we haven't heard anything on our adoption because Chinese New Years has been going.  However, this is the last day of vacation for them and so "game on".

Please don't forget to pray,
Laurie

Update on Prayer Request

Hello all,

I have an update on John.  I have talked with his mom and she said that he is better and on a regular ventilator, but that he is not in the "safe zone" just yet.  Please continue to pray for him, his family and the wisdom of the doctors.  He is still under a lot of medication and his lungs need to heal some before they will take him off the ventilator.  Praise Jesus for the hope that we have today after the extremely difficult touch and go last night.  I would also appreciate prayer for his two sisters.  They have the same pneumonia, but not the underlying asthma problems.

Praising Jesus for the hope and praying for more healing,
Laurie

Urgent Prayer

Dear Friends and Family,

As many of you know I use to be a nanny for a family in the States.  I love this family very much and have maitained contact with them as the kids have grown.  Yesterday the youngest boy, John, who is 8 yrs. old, went into the Intensive Care Unit for severe pneumonia.  He is fighting for his life and is on a ventilator at the moment.  I ask you all to pray for him and his family right now.  I believe that God can heal him either miraculously or by the help of the doctors.  Please pray that he not only lives, but there is no damage to him with all that is going on.  

Thank you,
Laurie

Traveling

Hello all,

I know that a lot of you have asked for details about our child, but we can't share much just yet.  With the beginning of Chinese New Years on Feb. 3rd all is silent and will be until the end which is Feb.18th.  What I can tell you is our little boy is almost 3 years of age and is living in the Northwestern part of China.  We are so excited to finally come to the conclusion of this adoption.  After 3 1/2 years and 3 different countries we have finally found our child.  As you can tell by the video, Samuel is estatic.  He talks about him often and even pretent plays with him.  Samuel keeps asking to go to the toy store and buy a present for him.  I will share more when I can.

Meanwhile, Andreas and I had the privilage to travel to Scotland.  Mom and Dad Kjernald were very generous this Christmas with the stipulation that we did something fun with the money (thank you so much mom and dad).  So they took Sam for the weekend and we flew Ryan Air (about $30 for a roundtrip ticket) to Edinburgh.  What a cool city.  I really liked it, even though it was misty and grey.  We flew in on Friday night (my first business of the evening was Starbucks!!!), we spend Saturday in Edinburgh and had a wonderful time meeting up with my childhood friend Paige Medlock (one of the highlights of the trip).  Then Sunday we took a trip out into the Highlands (Run by the hairy coo - story with the pictures).  Sunday night we went to St. Giles cathedral and joined in a communion service and Monday morning we flew home.  I really did like Scotland, but I have to say the biggest hightlight of the trip was simply spending time with my husband.  He truely is my best friend and I enjoy our get aways together.  Sorry ladies, but I think I married the best man ever!!!  All of my girlfriend may contest, but this is my belief.   

I will tell a little more about Scotland in pictures below.  We would appreciate your continued prayers for the adoption.  We are hoping to travel in May or June to pick him up.  

Blessings,

laurie

The pictures are actually backwards, but I'll work with it.  This is a lake in the highlands that freezes and they use to have curling contest on.  As in all things our tour guide says that the "sport" of curling comes from Scotland.  It may be true, anyone want to look it up.

In one of our stops there was this bench in the hills.  It is one of those Notting Hill benches and I thought it was sweet.

Part of the gorgeous Highlands of Scotland.  I would love to go back and see it in the summer.

Self portrait of course.

Below is a Hairy coo (cow).  Our tour guide runs a company called The Hairy Coo.  They provide free tours into the highlands and then at the end you can pay what you feel it is worth or what you can afford.  We had our reservations, especially when we strolled up to an orange minibus that said "Honk if your Horny" on the back.  However, it was a really good tour and the tour guide really knew his history (did anyone know that Tony Blair was Scotish?).  We had a lot of stops so it wasn't all driving and saw some great places.  The Hairy coo was brought to Scotland by Vikings and apparently the Vikings took the Scotish women and left the coos.  Hope it was a good trade! This particular coo is Hamish and he is famous in Scotland.

In the town of Callendar.  This is the border of the Highlands from the lowlands (makes sense). What a beautiful sight to see everyday.  

Andreas and I had fish and chips (really good ones) in Callendar.

This my friends is Doune Castle.  What castle you ask?  Well, (and this is particularly to my friend Dave Rhodes), this is the castle that Monty Python used in 1974 to produce the low budget Holy Grail movie.  So this is my best "you stupid British K'nigits" face.  No battles were fought at this castle, but the Stewarts of Scotland owned it.

That is my good looking man. (not the red one)

This is the main William Wallace monumet.  Apparently there are about 20 monuments, but this one is in Sterling where William Wallace and his gang fought for the castle (picture to come).  Our tour guide set us straight about what really happened with William Wallace and not how the movie told us it was.

The famous Sterling Castle.  This castle switched hands many times during the wars.  The famous or infamous, Mary Queen of Scots was here a bit and left her son here and never got to see him again (due to Catholic vs. Protestant issues).  Sterling is also where my friend Paige is doing her Ph.D.  Apparently, it is worth seeing, but we didn't have time. I guess we have to go again.  

This is carved in the front of the Wallace monument.  I really liked it.  What amazing stone work.  The thistle on the top is considered the national flower (I think).  It was everywhere.  

 This is the Edinburgh Castle.  It is amazing to look at.  It is hard to believe the so long ago they took all the stone and put it on this mountain.  There was a huge line, so we didn't get to go all the way inside, but we saw some of it.  It stands at the top of the Royal Mile.

These are haggis balls.  Hopefully, I can get the video up of us trying them.  Yes, they look really gross, but the Scotish really seem to love them.

Below is Paigee (as I call her).  Sorry men, this beautiful woman is off the market.  She is not only beautiful, but incredibly talented in art, among other things.  She is the one that taught me stain glass and pretty much all the other artistic things I can do.  Thanks Paigee.  It was really good to see her and get to see how the Lord is working in her life. Thanks for coming and meeting us.  We are standing in the Edinburgh castle.  

My wonderful husband and I in front of the Edinburgh castle.

Two doors down from our hotel was a cafe called Chocolate Soup.  Of course we had to go and get hot choclate there.  The cup says " it's a Chocolate thing".  Need I say more.

The Edinburgh Parliment is a cool work of art in itself.  On the side it had many quotes and I liked this one.  

This mount is called "Author's seat".  You can walk up there.  It is one of those places that King Author and the knights of the round table were said to have a place.  It is so cool to be in the city and then all of the sudden see these amazing outcroppings.

This is the Queen's palace at the bottom of the Royal Mile.  Of course the Scots call her the Queen of Scotland and not the Queen of England.

On another outcropping of the city stood this.  Very cool.  We never did figure out what it was for though.

This sign made me laugh.  Would you really shop for fruit and veggies from someone who is OFF License.  Sounds a bit risky to me.  But then again, the Scots eat haggis.....

A cool pic of the stone buildings on the Royal Mile.  

This is the Edinburgh Castle at night.  The city is quite amazing and we didn't have very much time to explore, but I am really glad that we had a chance to go.  Thanks again Mom and Dad.

What Happens to "Them"?

Dear Friends, 

I have seen some buzz about this article and most recently in a friends blog (who has adopted 4 from Ethiopia, 2 being older boys).  I think it is very important for us to think about what this article deals with and act as Christians.  If God is putting an older child on your heart please pursue this.  There is a desperate need.  You can see my friends blog by going to the ones I follow on the right hand side of this page (The Kinnells). Love Without Boundaries is a great organization and well worth supporting also.  

On My Own

When many people think of an orphanage, I think they often envision babies and toddlers. I used to be one of those people myself. On my many trips to China, however, I began meeting and falling in love with the older children who have grown up in institutions, many who never had any true chance of finding a permanent home. Their faces and stories are in my heart forever now, and sadly many of my memories of these great kids involve tears. Tears from Jenny, who broke down on her 14th birthday when she realized that she had aged out of the adoption system without being chosen. The final realization that she would never know what it meant to have a mom or dad of her own caused her to fall into a deep depression. Tears from Lily, a 17-year-old girl whom I had given my jacket after she admired it. When she refused to accept it initially, I put my hand on her shoulder and said, “But of course you have to take it because you are like family to me.” And it was at that one word, “family,” that this normally stoic young lady broke down and sobbed uncontrollably, as it is the one thing that she longed for.

By far, however, the most emotional moment of my time in China came one night when I was able to meet with a group of older orphaned teens I had watched grow up over a five year period. Every time I would visit their orphanage, I would enjoy getting to know them more. They all seemed so close, such good friends, and they always had smiles for me when I arrived. That night, however, was a night when the kids finally let their guard down. It was a night of real conversation and sharing what it means to grow up as an orphan. Toward the end of the evening we were all in tears. Afterwards, one of the older boys stayed to talk with me privately. I am hesitant to even write of it now as it was such a deeply personal and emotionally raw conversation. I will share, however, that he told me that growing up without a mother or father “hurts more than death.” Children aren’t supposed to raise themselves. They are not supposed to grow up alone, which I know sounds impossible when you are growing up in a crowded orphanage. The reality, though, is that hundreds of thousands of orphaned children feel utterly and completely ALONE. I held this incredible and wonderful teen in my arms as he sobbed about how much he wanted a mom, and I can’t think of it now without great pain.

Why was I given the opportunity to be born into a family who could take care of me, while millions of children are born into situations so sad and filled with hurt that many people don’t even want to hear their stories? I have struggled with that question for years with no answers. But I do know that all of us who have been blessed to know what a family really is should make every effort possible to help those who are orphaned. If not us, then who?

The theme song for the 2008 Beijing Olympic Games was a song called “You and Me.” It has been sung to me by children in orphanages many times, and it always makes me cry. The words haunt me… especially for the older children who have grown up feeling so alone: “Put your hand in mine. You and me, from one world. We are family.”

How I wish those words were true in every person’s heart. How I wish everyone believed that we need to treat people as family and share our ever shrinking world. What a wonderful place this would be if every adult took the hand of a child in need and didn’t let go. To all of the older orphaned children who have aged out of the possibility of ever finding a family, I send my heartfelt prayers. You are not forgotten. And we will continue doing our very best to help in every way possible.

Amy Eldridge is the Executive Director of Love Without Boundaries.

Love Without Boundaries proudly advocates for adoption but is not an adoption agency. We invite you to contact adoptionassistance@lwbmail.com with questions about a child we have featured and encourage you to contact your local adoption agency for more information about China’s Waiting Child Program.

And here is more from Amy Eldridge:

Amy Eldridge of LWB shares her insights
December 01,2010 / Amy Eldridge

Editor's Note: Although Amy addressed the concept of adopting an older child from China, the reality for these children is true across all countries. As the adoptive mom of two older children, I can share that the rewards are well worth it! -Martha Osborne

I've been asked a lot recently how I feel about the growing number of adoption pleas we see for kids who are almost turning 14 and aging out of the international adoption process. Some people have written me that they feel it is wrong to make a child start over at age 13 or 14, having to learn a new language and not really understanding what it means to live in a family. Many have expressed concern that the kids will be leaving the friends they have had their whole lives, while of course others spread the news far and wide that a child is about ready to age out, wanting to help them find a permanent home.

After working with teens in China for the last 7 years, I advocate for older child adoption for many reasons. While it is impossible to make sweeping generalizations since every orphanage is different, here are some of my reasons for
believing every child, regardless of age, deserves a chance at a family to love them:

1) Many people do not realize the deep and ingrained stigma that an orphaned child often faces in Chinese
society (and many other cultures). Orphans are often felt to be unlucky or even "cursed," and so they often have many
strikes against them when it comes time to go to school or find a job.

There are many different levels of schools in China; many orphaned children are only able to attend the lowest level schools, as parents who are paying higher fees for the better schools don't want their children to have to attend
with "unlucky orphans". Education is so important in Chinese society, and parents often push their children to try harder and work longer on their homework. Orphaned children rarely have anyone pushing them or encouraging them, and so we frequently work with young teens who only have rudimentary educations and who have trouble believing their lives will ever be better. The few dozen children in orphanages whom we have been honored to sponsor for college are the exception. To actually make it to university as an orphaned child is a true achievement. And even after graduating, jobs are often very difficult to come by due to businesses again not wanting to employ people who might bring bad luck to the company. Many of you might remember the young lady we helped earn an accounting degree in college a few years ago. She was unable to find a job in her hometown because of her orphan status. She was finally hired by the local government when no private company would agree to hire her.

2) Some people might ask how anyone would know you were an orphan after you left the institution. Couldn't you just keep it quiet? There are several factors that make it hard to ever lose your "orphan" status. The first is your hukou, the formal registration status that every individual in China has. Your hukou is family-based in your home city, and orphaned children often have a "group" hukou that clearly identifies them as not having a family. In addition, in the past it was very common for orphanages to use "created" surnames for the children in their care. For example, many orphanages used the last name of "Fu," which directly implies an orphan, or else they used the first syllable of the town or district, such as Shan or Mei. These "created" surnames often immediately identify a child as not having a real family. Because of this, and knowing the trouble that orphaned children often have assimilating into Chinese society, the government has recently been giving children more common last names, such as Li or Chang.

3) Almost everything in Chinese society revolves around the family, and great reverence is giving to one's ancestors and lineage. During major holidays, if at all possible, you return to your family. For orphaned children who age out of the social welfare system, they often find life very difficult with no family ties, and they frequently live on the margins
of society.

4) Many people worry that the older children being adopted don't really want to leave their home country. At least in the orphanages where we work, the children are always asked, and in many cases, they have to pass a provincial interview before they can be registered for adoption. Many provinces require the child to sign papers that they want to be adopted. As a mom of teens myself, I really admire the kids who find the courage to overcome their fears in order to have a chance at a family, a real education, and a fresh start, but it does raise the question of whether a 12 or 13 year old should be left on their own to make such a life-impacting decision.

I wouldn't allow my 13 year old to decide their entire future on their own, and so adoptive parents need to understand
the great fear and cold feet that can come on adoption day. We need to remember that there are often cases where
the older kids in orphanages who have already aged out of adoption will tell the younger children scary stories about
foreign parents, since they were unable to have the same opportunity. Aunties will often tell a child that they can never do anything wrong or they will be returned. There is indeed deep pressure put on children who agree to adoption at an older age to be good, and it is understandable why there is so much anxiety, fear, and tears on adoption day since very few aunties or children really have a clear understanding of what life will be like for a child outside of China.

One mom told me how incredibly hard it was to see her new daughter crying on the phone to her orphanage a few days post-adoption. She said it was easy to think, "Am I really doing the right thing taking her away from all she has known?" Many older kids have told me how scared they were to even consider adoption, but the desire for a family is something that many of them carry deeply in their hearts.

5) Another question that is frequently asked is why are we hearing about so many kids about ready to age out
now when there were so few over the last ten years? After speaking with dozens of orphanage directors, it is clear
that the majority of them truly believed that Westerners only wanted babies to adopt, and I think for many years that was a fair assumption, since many families put as young as possible on their home studies. Many of us know people who even requested that they wanted a 3-5 year old child and yet were referred a baby. Even in 2007 and 2008, when LWB was conducting provincial trainings on special needs adoptions, the audience, filled with aunties and directors, would shake their heads as if they couldn't believe us when we said people were willing to adopt children who were 11, 12, and 13. Many orphanages would start out by agreeing to submit paperwork on one or two older orphaned children, and then as they saw those children be adopted, they would agree to send more files. The CCAA also started new initiatives, matching agencies with orphanages to see if families could be found for the older children. It has been a slow and steady process for orphanages to realize that older children most definitely can find families through the adoption process. It has been wonderful for us at LWB to see the older children in the orphanages where we have worked for five years or longer finally get a chance at a permanent home.

How do you feel about older child adoption? Have you ever considered it or have you personally adopted a child older
than 10? LWB has several volunteers who have adopted teens who are more than willing to discuss both pre- and post-adoption issues with families. You can always contact us at info@lwbmail.com for more information!

Amy Eldridge is the Executive Director of Love Without Boundaries and the mom to seven wonderful kids (2 from
China). LWB has launched a new blog this month, located at: http://www.lwbcommunity.org/

A Must Watch!!!!

For those who are curious I have a link to a video that we made.  It is a little dark, but good news doesn't understand time, so we took the video when we could.  Enjoy!                                  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8F5R5dxw-a0

LID!!!!!!

For all of you out there who have adopted from China you know what those precious 3 little letters stand for.  Your LID officially stands for you "Log In Date" at China's Center for Adoption Affairs (CCAA).  We officially received our LID last Wednesday, Praise Jesus.  We just found out today in an email and we are so thankful that it actually happened before the Chinese New Year holidays beginning on Feb. 3. This is a huge burden lifted from us, especially my husband, because it means that all the paperwork was okay and we can proceed (it was my husband that did all the paperwork this time around because it was in Swedish).  So now we begin the next phase of waiting for the actual referral.  Our agency checks the list everyday and new kids are put on once a month... so we wait.  It works a little differently here than in the US.  Here we wait for our agency to find a child that matches what we said we can handle (we don't actually see the listings).  In the States you can actually see some lists yourself and/or can be given a referral off the list before you see it.  The last family from our agency waited about 6 weeks before receiving and referral and with the New Year holidays from Feb. 3rd  to (I believe) Feb. 18th there will be no new referrals during this time.  We will have about 72 hours to accept or decline a referral.  Once we accept a referral we will usually be traveling about 6 weeks after that.  Again, these time lines could always change and most likely will.  So, for now we are not holding our breath, but trusting that God has our child in his hands. Not as easy as that sounds, but the only way to handle this wait.

Last night Andreas and I found the dvd from the moment we picked up Sam.  We watched the hour video which included driving down Nepali streets and the first moments that I was able to see and hold him, to the first moments in our hotel room with a terrified Sam, to the next morning when he was happy and fine.  Then I realized we began his adoption on January 15, 2005 and we were watching his video on January 15, 2011.  What an amazing 6 years it has been.  Not always easy, but the video was a good reminder of how blessed we have been with Samuel.  It makes me look forward to our next child.  I praise Jesus for these amazing children that we will have the privilege of calling ours.

Blessings,
Laurie

Quick Thought for Today

Today we are sitting in our house in the woods.  It is a winter wonderland outside and when we came yesterday we found that we had a plumbing problem.  We will be able to fix it soon, but that left us with no water.  So....snow it is.  Yes, we have been hauling in a ton of snow for our water needs.  Nothing like a little adventure.  It is actually quite easy to put together a system because we had no water all of last winter also.  Last winter we used Andreas' uncle's house for water (about 200 feet away), but we were afraid that their pipes were frozen, so it is snow for us.  Tastes a little different, but as long as it's not yellow (no thanks to our dog) it's good.

I really got on here to say that today is the first day the Nina and Wes Mullins meet their twins in Ethiopia.  I have been thinking and praying for them all day.  Please pray with me that all is well and they have the time with the kids that they need.  Also pray for their court date, can't remember off my head what that is.  You can go do to the blogs that I read and find them to keep up with their journeys.

Blessings,
Laurie

The First Entry of the Year

Hello folks, and Happy New Year,
I know it has been two weeks since New Years and I am finally getting things together to blog again.  One of the reasons I don't blog so much is we are trying to set up a system that I can download all of my pictures, but for some reason we can't seem to get it together and so I have about 2000 pictures on my camera and I cannot download them at the moment.  So I have downloaded a few to share.

Before going to far I wanted to say a huge CONGRATS to the Taufer's.  Vicki and Nima have been stuck in Nepal waiting for a VISA and today (after almost 6 months) Vicki received word that she is getting her VISA!!!! Vicki, I am doing a happy dance with Nima for you.

Also, Nina and Wes Mullins will be boarding a plane in just a few hours to Ethiopia. Once there, they will meet their twins, go to court, and hopefully bring them home quickly.  Congratulations you guys, can't wait to see pics.  You are included in the happy dance also (sorry folks, no video of the dance).

I have to admit that I have been struggling lately.  This 3 1/2 year, 3 different country adoption journey is weighing me down at the moment.  I know that God is in control and I know that this is all in the timing that it should be according to Him.  I know that our paperwork is in China right now and that it really won't be that long (hopefully) in the big scheme of things, but I am tired and my heart is aching for my child (I need to find rest in the God that promises he will give it to us).  Someday, my child may read this and this is what I would say the him/her if he/she were here:

I have loved you since you were a thought and a dream.
I don't know you by sight, smell, sound, touch, age or even gender, but I know you in my heart.
It seems as we have searched the world and yet you seem so close.
I cry for you and somehow I know that you cry for me too.
We talk about you as if you are here with us, and you are, in the dreams of our heart.
Most of all I want to hold you and comfort you.  To watch you grow and thrive.  To watch you play with your big brother and to teach you about the God that brought us together.
One day, hopefully before my heart bursts, we will be together and this mother's love will no longer be held back or hampered by distance and knowledge.  
I love you my child,
mom

Thanks for reading the ramblings of one crazy mom right now.  I know that so many of you have felt the same thing and are struggling right now also.  May we all take heart in the bigger picture of what God is doing and allow all of this to shape us into the image of who He is.  Maybe the ache of the heart for these children is already a part of this image. Oh, but I have such a long way to go.

Enjoy the pictures below.  Blessings on all of you tonight.

These pics are from the 1st and 2nd of January, when we were still at the ocean house.  I love this goof ball.  He is such a blessing.... even when I am annoyed with him.  I thank God for his wonderous child.

Already looking all G.Q.  (and he knows how to pose for the camera).

New Years was quite relaxing.  Even the dog got into the groove of things.

This is us saying goodbye to the ocean just before we left.  Andreas got a hold of the camera.

This is what we came home to.  Yes, a very dead tree.  Even some of the ornaments had fallen off because the tree was so dead and wouldn't hold them.  We actually put the tree out one of the windows behind it.  Although there wasn't any needles left on the branches.  I love Sam's face in this picture.

Andreas is in Stockholm at a church conference and this is what I woke up to this morning.  We have had a lot of snow, but  when it sticks to the trees it is just gorgeous and makes everything beautiful.  I loved the light this morning so I snapped a few pics.  I can so get the phrase..."and you shall be washed as white as snow".  This all brings new meaning to that for me.

Laurie